“Sad?” enquired Spur, “Sad? Why exactly are you sad? Did you see things
that brought pity to your heart? Did you meet someone who imparted bad
news to you? What do you mean, sad?” “I mean sad, Spur, I mean I am left
with a feeling that all is not well, that there are things in my life,
in my head that are less than perfect, not that I have any idea what perfect
is; no, wait, I do know, flowers are perfect, nature is perfect, and yet
I feel that even flowers and nature have their woes, do you know what I
mean?” Kopec was bumbling, fumbling for the correct example, the ideal
indicator of his emotional state. “When I – When I went, where I went,
for whatever reason, all the voices that I heard and colours that I saw
all seemed imbued with a sense of tragedy, I’ve never really experienced
that before, Spur. I feel that somehow, I have been changed, and it is
an uneasy change at that.”
“All life is change, old friend” “Oh my god Spur, I expect more than
mere platitudes from you, of all people, er, dragons, whatever! Really,
you are beginning to disappoint me, you set me up for this experience,
and when I try to tell you what I’m feeling, all I get is “All life is
change”...please, spare me the Mr. Buddha routine!”
“Ah, there you have it, Kopec” Spur interjected, apparently nonplussed
by Kopec’s outburst. “Buddha! Ha!”
“Buddha, ha!?” said Kopec , incredulously. “Buddha. And what does the
Buddha have to say that would shed light on my feelings of sadness, disquiet
and dissatisfaction?”
“Well” said Spur with great weight “These feelings that you are displaying
are, we are told, the very same ones that led the great master of insight
to explore his own mind, and to seek answers for the oldest questions of
all time, life and death, suffering and desire. Are these not the same
questions that plague your mind Kopec?” “It would appear so, Spur,
although I am loathe to think that of all the possible answers you could
proffer, you fall back on Religion, or popular psychology. I thought you
would be a far more original thinker.” Quickly, Spur responded “I would
like to assure you my friend, that I have indeed more original thoughts
than you could possibly imagine...I was not in any way attempting to proselytize
you, I’m sure you are far too sophisticated and educated to fall prey to
that device. I was merely injecting a start point to further thought, I’m
sure you will go further with the idea!”
“That all life is change, is too obvious an observation, isn’t it?”
“Not really, not when you put a magnifying glass on it” offered Spur. “I
mean that when you take the simple statement, and focus on it, you will
find that it impacts all further thought. Of course it is a simple statement,
but it is a basic truth. When this truth is held up against all instances
it initiates a profound feeling of immediacy. I believe this is what you
are feeling, the immediacy of the poignant, and yes, it is sad. Nothing
is going to stay as it is, at the moment of perception or in any of the
following moments either. I believe that what you have experienced is the
collective wail of the suffering of all sentient life, all that has consciousness
of its’ own consciousness. That is all I meant to convey, and was my reason
for mentioning the Buddha. All the word means, after all, is to be awake,
to be aware. Today, you have awoken to awareness on your part of the condition
of life. What you do with this awareness will determine where your mind
will take you from here”
“My goodness, Spur, you are indeed ‘The Teacher’ aren’t you” replied
Kopec. ‘I’m not trying to be sarcastic, but your explanation does nothing
to address my feelings.”
“Then you must address them yourself,” said Spur. “Might I suggest
that I am not your teacher, but merely the one who has appeared in your
life to make you the teacher”?
“Now I feel much better” snickered Kopec “ You put all the burdens
of research on me”
“You are in school Kopec, it is up to you to take the journey of inwardness.
Welcome to ‘The Inward Bound School’, as rough parallel to the ‘Outward
Bound School’ those difficult children are often subjected to. You will
find great mountains, chasms, raging rivers and inclement weather in your
own mind, I can assure you, equal to any you will encounter in the ‘real’
world. I will be your guide, but you must make the journey yourself, and
I warrant you will find strengths and endurance you had not thought possible
to this point.”
With that, Spur relaxed, settled back on his haunches, and drilled
Kopec with a stare that was ferocious in its’ compassion. Kopec pulled
his arms from the table, turned to look at the open window, and was surprised
to feel warm, wet tears running down his cheeks. He raised his hand to
wipe them away, ashamed to be showing such emotion before his guest. “I’m
sorry I accused you of shallowness, Spur” sniffled Kopec. “I’m a reluctant
student, but I appreciate, most sincerely, your interest in me. Night is
drawing in, perhaps we should eat something, that is, if I can find something”
“As you think best” said Spur “Allow me to present supper” and with
these words, before Kopec could blink, Spur had materialized a fine feast
of fresh bread, butter, cheese and a modest bottle of wine. The table was
filled, and again Kopec wiped his eyes, this time in amazement. “What a
magic show” he sighed.
“Eat, drink, you will feel better. We have miles to go, you and I.
We must keep up our strength, no?” and with this Spur opened the wine with
his talons and sliced in a very handy fashion, the cheese. “You butter
the bread, Kopec”